What are His Feelings

 Another Related Article: How Men Think

Amy RosenthalWritten by: Amy Rosenthal


woman wondering what men secretly wantWhen you are thinking of starting a relationship with a guy that you think is the right man you may sometimes wonder what he is feeling. Or you could be in a relationship currently, yet you still don’t know what are his feelings because he’s so secluded. You expect him to say the sweet words to pour out his feelings for you, but such an expectation isn't materializing as you would love it. What you must know is that men are quite different from ladies in that they mostly find it rather hard to put their feelings into words. And when they fail to do that, their partners may probably start getting worried over whether their men truly care or not. Men find it easier to show their feelings through actions, so you need to be able to interpret their actions. Anyways, here are some ideas that could serve as pointers to what are his feelings.  



Directing the Conversation 


A lot of times men will give the shortest possible answer to a question. They won’t


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elaborate on things or will give a general answer to multiple questions. Women 

however have a lot more opinions on a lot of the smaller details of a subject. If you want to know what he thinks about you getting your hair cut short, the question should be targeted. Asking, “what do you think about my hair” or, “what do you think of short hair” is too general. This question should be targeted as; “what are your thoughts on me cutting my hair short, does it make me prettier or do you think it doesn’t look as good”. Understand that men are very focused and goal orientated. If you want to know what are his feelings about a subject you’re going to need to direct a very specific question there. You can also encourage conversation by first telling your brief opinion about the subject you want him to elaborate on.  



Asking men who know him 


Men tend to open up to men better because they get each other. One way of knowing what are his feelings, is through other men.  Men who know him can read his signs and feelings easily, because they can relate to him. Checking in with them can be a better source of knowing his feelings than your girlfriends who don’t understand men. Just make sure you’re not going to make him feel like you’re going behind his back. Guessing on what he’s feeling can be unreliable because you’re assuming from a woman’s point of view. If another guy friend of his isn’t around, you could ask a man of his similar type, who acts and reminds you of him. 



How they show love 


Generally men will express love through different ways than women. Where many women use words, men will use other forms of expressions. Where the words and his touch are very easy to guess his intentions, he may use a subtler expression sometimes. He’ll do things for you, or get you small gifts, or give you slight words of encouragement. Does he phone up on you to see if you want a coffee during his lunch break? Or give you uplifting words when you’re looking down. If you're testing to see if he likes you, and you want to know what are his feelings, get a female co-worker or friend to act sad around him. Then compare it to how he responds when you do the same. These are things men do caringly, watch for them.  



Seeing his past 


Generally speaking, a man’s emotions don’t spike up and down like a rollercoaster. He’s also most likely a creature of pattern. Looking into his past and how he processed and felt in similar situations can be insightful. If you know people who know him and you’re not going to offend him by asking, get them to tell you how he processed similar situations. If he’s someone you’re interested in, this is a great way of finding out how he behaves around women he likes. You can find out if he’s the shy type, or the direct type. Does he try to impress them with humor, or his charm? After all they’ve seen parts of him you haven’t, so do some investigating to find what are his feelings. 



The Momentary Look 


The way a man steals a glimpse at you is a sure way by which you can tell what he is feeling about you. So, you are out somewhere, maybe with friends, and you notice this cute dude taking a quick look at you every so often. He is only trying to take in the details and size his chances of hitting it off with you. Let's just say that it's his way of telling you he's interested in you so get prepared for the approach part of the game. One way to test this is to look directly into his eyes, if his eyes come in contact with your's, then quickly dash away, it’s a sign he’s interested. Alternatively if he holds eye contact then gives you a smile, it’s a sure sign he’s into you too. 



Effort to Impress 


When a man appears to be trying too hard to do things that could impress you, it is also a clue of what are his feelings toward you. It is not a strange thing to see a man trying to show off his intelligence and all his good qualities in your presence when he likes you. For example, he may even try to play the macho by making attempts to lift a weight that he has never succeeded in lifting in several attempts before just to display his strength in your presence. This is even truer of the younger men, who use that to tell women of their interest. He could be constantly trying to make you laugh by doing silly things or telling jokes. Watch how he acts around other people to see the difference in behavior when he’s around you. 



His Demeanor While Talking with You 


Another clue that you should be on the lookout for in determining what are his feelings about you is how he behaves when you are both having a conversation. If he is fond of extending conversations with you beyond what is necessary and combine that with some seductive eye contact, he is telling you something about how he feels -- I am interested in you. Does he remember little details you’ve talked about or things you did. Test him by telling him a bogus story about your weekend or some small details about something you like. If he remembers them and they come up in conversation later, they can be a sign that you’re on his mind more than you think. 



Concern about Your Welfare 


This is yet another useful indicator of what a guy is feeling for you. When a guy takes special concern in your welfare or happiness, it is a clear give away of what are his feelings. Try looking tired or stressed around him, see if he shows concern. Does this happen more than you’re other co-workers? If so he could be interested. Ask him about his weekend, this will make him ask you about yours. Does he ask further questions about your weekend? Or ask how you felt about things that happened? 



When you are trying to figure out what a guy is feeling, it is not really that difficult. Men can sometimes be closed-off or not have as much to say. They need to be probed and poked into getting out what they feel. Just know that men are not all that very good in expressing their feelings verbally like women. Besides, it is said that actions speak louder than words, so try and take the clues as they are being given. 





woman wondering what men secretly want




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